Am I Competent for the Task?

As a pastor I often wonder how God works out His plan through me (and us)?  How is it that God can take misled, mixed up, malcontents and use them to spread the word about His Son Jesus Christ?  And, how then can He expect that anyone would come to hope in Jesus when the message comes through such messed up people?

The reality is that I, and every other pastor out there, am a mess of sin and striving and insecurity and worry. Find me a preacher completely comfortable in his role and his spiritual life and you will have found a phony.   No one can stand before the people of God to speak His Words and be completely at peace with his own sin.

To make a living and respond to the call of Christ on our lives we must look our own sin square in the face daily and try to deal with it for your benefit.  It is a gut-wrenching task and anyone who says it isn't probably wants you to give them "seed" money... but that's for another post.

I was reading this morning in 2 Corinthians 2 and found a couple verses at the end of the chapter that spoke to this issue of insecurity so perfectly I needed to share them with you.  Here's how Paul dealt with this complexity.

"Is anyone competent to take it on?" (He had been talking about sharing the Gospel) "No— but at least we don't take God's Word, water it down, and then take it to the streets to sell it cheap. We stand in Christ's presence when we speak; God looks us in the face. We get what we say straight from God and say it as honestly as we can."

You could probably accuse me of a lot as a pastor and as an individual.  But you can't accuse me of watering down God's Word.  I never have and don't plan on starting.  I pray earnestly that God speak through me and use the words that come out of my mouth to bring life to those who hear.  I shudder at times as I prepare and then deliver a message because of the heavy burden to be in Christ's presence and speak for Him (as though He needs me).  But I have no other option.  His Spirit compels me.

So I preach the whole Gospel to the best of my weak and feeble ability and try to stand in the Strength of Christ and look God in the face.  What a wretched man I am and from what a wretched people... who will save me from myself.  Thanks be to God in Christ Jesus who gives me the victory and the strength.